Introduction to Dating Disasters
There are some things that you simply must not do when it comes to approaching, seducing and dating women. In fact, some of the 10 Dating Don’ts listed here are Don’ts in general in life in whatever situation you are in.
So take heed that you need to cast a critical eye over yourself and the girls that you are going to meet to save yourself a lot of failures and heartache in the long run.
Of course there are always exceptions to the rules and I am sure that some people have broken almost every rule in this article and are blissfully married and having their diamond anniversary, but for the rest of us, stick to the rules!
So, let’s go ahead and see where most guys out there are making 95% of their mistakes.
Bad Body Language
You’ve got to look cool and relaxed, but not overconfident or arrogant. Watch interviews with people like Tom Cruise, Christian Bale and Colin Farrell and study how they sit, react to questions and talk to get an idea.
Never give yourself fully to a girl before they have earned it and deserve it. When walking up to a girl don’t give them all of your body language straight away (this was covered in-depth in the “Successful Dating Techniques from START TO FINISH” book). Only turn to face them fully as a reward when they have done something you like and remember to turn away again if they do something you don’t like.
Try not to fidget too much and if you are not sure or feel nervous relax your hand gestures and keep them to a minimum. Don’t jump about or hop from foot to foot nervously. Relax your head neck and shoulders, place your feet firmly more than shoulder width apart and take in nice deep breaths especially before you go to speak.
Strong body language = Alpha Maleness
This is more for when you are actually dating, but some guys are doing this right from the beginning and it stinks of neediness, insecurity and desperation. All bad.
Some guys seem to constantly seek the approval of the girls they are with. You know, like constantly checking that they are OK, that they like the bar they have taken them to, that she likes the clothes they are wearing, that the meal is alright, just constantly checking for and needing their approval .
Now I’m not saying that you ignore the girls needs, not at all, in fact on the contrary, but don’t feel the need to second guess her wishes and desires AND THEN ask them if you got it right or not all the time!
Remember, a girl WANTS you to be in charge, take control and be the alpha male, confident in your decisions and actions. Girls don’t want to have to constantly reassure you that you are doing things correctly.
Trust your instincts, lead the date, be strong and have fun. At the end of the day it doesn’t matter what happens on a date as long as she is having fun, right!
Neediness is the biggest passion killer for women and something you really need to iron out of your personality to be really successful meeting women. It is covered again and again in the “Mind Success FROM START TO FINISH” book and here we recap on some points and add a few others.
Hot girls are so used to guys falling over themselves to impress them. Buying drinks for them (when the guy doesn’t even know them), letting them push in front at the queue to the bar, even simple things like letting them interrupt the conversation you were having with your friend. If you let girls get away with that kind of crap and you bow down to their every whim you are putting out a message of neediness. Most girls don’t respect a guy of they are like this and it certainly isn’t alpha male.
Be careful of needy body language too. If you are standing or sitting speaking to a girl don’t feel the need to lean in towards her in case she can’t hear you talking. If she can’t hear you tell her to move closer or pull her in towards you, never lean in towards her, or anyone else for that matter.
If they ask you to take a photo of them with their friends decline or pass the camera to another poor shmuck who will be all too eager to take the photo. You aren’t their cameraman and don’t go taking their empty drink glass like a waiter if they hand it to you to take to the bar.
If they tell you they are going to the bathroom or to quickly speak to a friend, don’t wait around for them like a little lost puppy dog. Go off yourself and make sure that you are chatting to another girl or group of people before she gets back. Never wait around for them.
Most of all, never ever chase after them if they walk away from you. With any luck you will get the level that you will know way before they do want to leave your company that the interaction isn’t going your way and will finish the conversation and leave on your own terms anyway. If not though, don’t chase them and instead immediately start talking to someone else or another group of people.
Not Expressing Your Needs
Maybe you are an assertive person and therefore don’t have that problem, but most men tend to cover up their needs from their partner.
Trouble is, not only do they get frustrated when their needs aren’t met, but it is so not alpha male it starts to make you look really weak and it can sometimes be a slow downward spiral for you from there on in.
If you are not being honest and expressing what your needs are and what you want from the outset, then how can you be yourself? How can you really have fun? And how can you be true to yourself?
The same goes for the girl, you have to be able to help her communicate clearly to you what she likes and what she doesn’t like and what she wants and desires and what she doesn’t.
Be direct, but be tactful!